Being in a serious relationship means that you’re now deciding as one with your partner. But what types of decisions should you have a larger say in? There are a lot of things that couples decide together. Most of it revolves around living arrangements and relationship issues. Some things, however, should be decided on individually. These are the decisions that affect you—or your body—more than your partner. Sometimes, we have to think more about ourselves than the ones we love. I know it’s hard to swallow, but sometimes prioritising your needs can work out best for everyone involved.

When should partners decide together? Partners should run every decision by each other. You can agree on something together, but you might disagree on some things, as well. Luckily for you, there’s a thing called compromise, and all couples would do well to add that to their relationship vocabulary. As a couple, you need to make huge decisions about where you will live, how much time you’re going to spend on work and each other, and how much time you should spend on yourselves. Apart from that, there are also decisions that have to be made about money, career choices, and your other relationships with family, colleagues, and friends. But that’s not to say that these decisions can be made together, without any problems. Sometimes, you won’t see eye to eye, and that’s where you have to draw the line in determining who gets to decide.

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Who holds the reins in the decision?

Some might say that the dominant entity in a relationship makes all the decisions. But that’s hardly the case in this modern day and age. You and your partner should decide on most things together—especially on the issues that affect both of you significantly. When you and your partner disagree, one of you will win. However, when someone doesn’t get their way, some friction might develop between you two, which could stem from resentment or anger. That’s why you need to agree, or risk ruining your trust in each other. But what happens when the decision can’t be made together?

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